Embracing Neurodiversity: My Journey to Self-Acceptance

Sharing my truth, one post at a time.

May 03, 2025

The first clue was my inability to pick up reading as easily as the other kids could. The letters made no sense to me, and in the whole class of six-year-olds, I was the only one who struggled. I started reception in September of 1985, and my teacher had zero compassion for my difficulties. On a daily basis, she found it amusing that I was the only odd one out, and with no shame or consideration, she made fun of me in front of my classmates. To this day, I’m terrified of speaking or reading in public as I fear I might forget everything, and sometimes it does happen.

My creative self came to the rescue, creating accommodations that helped me crack the reading code. My secret, aka accommodation, was to learn all the words by heart, which worked for the time being. (This is how I learned English as well, by constant repetition, and this is the only way I can learn when I’m in a traditional setting. This method is exhausting and time-consuming.)

Unfortunately, the downside of learning by heart was my inability to store information in my long-term memory. To this day, I need a lot of repetition (I prefer to learn by practice or watching videos of specific things I’m trying to learn) and time between what I’ve learned and implementing that knowledge in real life. I’m also almost always over-prepared for meetings, tests, presentations, projects, you name it, just in case I forget everything. (Recently, I’ve been trying to be more flexible, especially regarding art projects.)

School was a permanent struggle with schoolwork, homework, time management and my mental health. I was called lazy and stupid on a weekly basis. Still, in all this name-calling, no one bothered to question why I couldn’t retain information and why some subjects and activities were impossible for me to complete or understand.

I must have been nearly 18 when I was finally tested for dyslexia. I’m pretty sure they only wanted to test me to prove that I was just “lazy” and didn’t study hard enough. The test came back positive, and I was informed that: “If I were to accept my dyslexic diagnosis, I wouldn’t be able to receive a higher grade on my A-Levels than C.” According to their logic, I was responsible for my neurodiversity (medical model of disability), and it was solely in my hands to “fix” my learning difficulties by working harder, not by getting the right support and accommodations.

I can’t change my neurodiversity, and I can’t fix it, as there is nothing wrong with me. This is how my brain works, and over the years, I’ve come to appreciate that. (I also have to thank my study support teacher, whom I worked with as a mature student.)

I’m a very creative, passionate, and hard-working person who doesn’t give up easily. I love learning the subjects I feel emotionally connected to. However, none of those qualities were appreciated when I was at school. The educational system wanted all the students to be the same, learn the same way, behave the same way, and, if possible, cause no trouble (asking for help, as in my case, was causing trouble). But people aren’t the same, even the neurotypical individuals differ from one another and don’t learn or process information the same way.

Can you imagine how dull the world would be if we were all exactly the same? Creativity and our differences make us unique, complex, unpredictable, and simply human.

I’m not the only neurodiverse individual traumatised by the school system and social misunderstanding of our needs and accommodations, which we often need to flourish. Neurodiverse kids around the world are still being traumatised and blamed for their difficulties as schools don’t support their needs, councils fight parents, and governments keep cutting budgets while at the same time expecting those kids they traumatise and leave with no support to become tax-paying adults in the future.

Despite all the difficulties—and the list is long—I wouldn’t want to live without my neurodiversity. As a neurodiverse creative, I have so much to give and offer if only the world would accept my offering and give me the time and space to be who I am.

If you have a neurodiverse individual in your life, look after them and be their champion in a world that desperately needs change by accommodating different life experiences and perspectives. Listening to those who think and live outside the box is the first step towards social change, which could pave the way towards a more equal society.

If your child is neurodiverse, advocate for your child and support them no matter what. Don’t be scared of the authorities and schools. The authorities in the UK do close to nothing to help our neurodiverse kids. I have two neurodiverse kids. My son is doing GCSE this year, and he received zero support from school throughout his education. All the support he has ever had was paid for privately. My daughter has been on a waiting list for 2 years to be assessed for her difficulties. In those 2 years, I received just one letter saying she wouldn’t be assessed as there was no evidence that something was wrong with her. The rest of the time, we are ghosted, and it’s not like you can show up and demand an assessment. Only schools can refer kids. How clever, right? Again, all the support my daughter has been receiving is paid out of pocket. Neurodiverse kids need support now, not in 5 years. The sooner they have the support, the more chances they have of becoming the “tax-paying citizens” governments so desperately need. The local councils in the UK have gotten into a habit of fighting with parents to withhold the right to provide education and support for neurodiverse kids, battles they often lose. At the same time, in that process, they can destroy families and children’s futures. This practice has been ongoing for years, and there is no political will to help our neurodiverse kids. However, as parents, it doesn’t mean we have to give up, fight them (not gonna be easy), organise and do what’s best for our kids.

PS.

If you want to chat about your child or share your story, please do reach out to me.

NOTES

1. You might find this video from the Guardian interesting: ‘Send Warrior Mums’: The parents fighting England’s school’s crisis, especially if you are a parent of a neurodiverse child.

2. I’m neurodiverse, and so are my kids; that fact won’t change. What I can do for myself and for them is advocate, show them how to look after their own uniqueness, and appreciate the positives of being neurodiverse (believe me, this is not all roses). The other day my daughter came home saying that her phonics teacher told her that “She wasn’t working hard enough, and she was fidgeting too much.” (You can even believe what happens inside of me when I hear such totally bullshite.) She was very upset, and the next day had mega tantrum before going to school. We spoke to her class teacher about the experience. The phonics teacher apologies to my daughter for making her upset. This experienced showed her that she needs to speak up and tell adults in her life what is happening so we can help her before she learns how to advocate for herself.

3. In this post, I won’t recommend neurodiverse organisations as each country operates differently. However, I can recommend Neurodiversity Celebration Week. They have many videos that focus on neurodiversity worldwide.

4. What I would also recommend is to watch the videos below, which can give us all a broader perspective on how young adults navigate life:

April updates on my art practice:

I finally finished updating my personal website. It took me a while, and the process was filled with a bit of drama. I feel it used to be easier to design websites than it is now.

You can check the results for yourself right here.

Makery

This new section on my Substack covers the practicalities of cultivating long-term art practice and includes making off videos.

YouTube

I’ve been busy on my YouTube channel as well, and in April, I put out the following:

A trailer for my Winter Garden project.

I added two videos to the Creativity Circle playlist.

The Creativity Circle isn’t only about cultivating a connection with our creative self but also about neurodiversity and how neurodiversity has shaped my art practice.

And if you are interested in updates on my Urban Garden, which is in London (UK), these are the videos:

Thanks so much for reading and watching, and I’ll see you next month for another volume of the Neurodiverse Lens.

Until next time, take care and happy creating.

With Love,

Magda

PS. I’m made by Made by Dyslexia, so expect small typos and big thinking.